The extract from an interview with and courtesy of Mistress Lubyanka. The complete interview can be read on the Mistresses website at: www.lubyanka.co.uk.
"What made you decide to become a professional dominatrix?"
I had been "playing" in the scene since shortly after I arrived in London almost eight years ago - firstly with friends and as time went by at various parties and clubs. Quite a few people suggested, as I seemed to be "a natural" when in role I should consider it as a career. At first I didn't take such suggestions seriously. Then I began meeting professional dommes at various events and found out a little more about their work. The idea of combining my passion with a career began to appeal more and more, having the opportunity to "play" more frequently without having to worry about my studies or "day-job" made a lot of sense. And so it was that last year (2002) I decided to give it a try. It's one of the best decisions I've ever made and so far I have enjoyed it immensely. Working as a professional allows me the freedom and time to devote to my "play" which I could never have afforded as an amateur. It's enabled me to devote time to perfecting some areas which I didn't have too much experience in and also to try lots of new things. The only way I can describe how fortunate I am to somebody who can't appreciate it is to ask them to think of their favourite activity/hobby (golf, football or whatever) and ask themselves how they would feel if somebody offered them the opportunity to become a professional?
What do you hope a slave takes away from a session with you?
I hope a slave takes away from a session the memory of a fantastic "trip" or "high", with his or her physical and mental emotions slowly and gradually subsiding over the subsequent days. I want him to feel he has been snared into my world and to sense an irresistible urge to serve me again and again. One of my slaves recently sent me an email the day after a session. He said he had been on such a high during the drive home, replaying things that happened during the session over and over in his mind that he had taken a wrong turning and got totally lost. Whilst I wouldn't wish for all of my slaves to get lost on the way home I must admit to getting quite a buzz from that.
What advice do you offer to those looking to serve a Mistress for the first time?
Be sure that you really are ready to turn fantasy into reality. Be realistic Ã¢â‚¬â€œ if you're considering making an appointment with a Mistress remember that the minute you walk into her chambers the fantasy ends. Be sure of the activities you are interested in and, more importantly, those which you are not.
Be aware of the difference between a professional dominatrix and an escort. Whilst the vast majority of professional Mistresses do provide a highly-charged and erotic experience they do not provide sexual services.
Do your research thoroughly and draw up a shortlist of Mistresses who appeal to you. Read a Mistress's website (if she has one) thoroughly to establish what she enjoys, what her limits are and whether you and she are likely to be compatible.
Good communication before a session is crucial. Explain in detail (but concisely) by email or telephone precisely what it is you are hoping for in a session. I've received so many emails from slaves saying "I wanted to be used by you totally in any way you choose" or "I want to be your 24/7 slave." It's just not realistic.
Do not be embarrassed to discuss your fantasies Ã¢â‚¬â€œ it is most unlikely yours will be new to her. A Mistress is not a mind-reader so if you want something you must spell it out. However, don't expect a Mistress to act out a detailed script. She will want the flexibility to build her own script around your interests so that she may also enjoy the session.
Establish that a Mistress conducts sessions according to Safe, Sane & Consensual practices and will issue you a "safe word" to use during a session.
Be polite and respectful in your communications and if you're not don't be surprised if a Mistress refuses to session with you.
Be conscious of a Mistress's time. Like any other professional her time is important and she will not be best pleased if you waste it. Never make an appointment unless you are confident you can keep it. If for any reason you can't then advise her at the earliest opportunity or don't be surprised to be blacklisted if you don't.
Keep an open mind during a session and be prepared to learn more about yourself as a person and the things you may enjoy and not enjoy.
Visit Alex Rubber's Rubber Sheets ezine at: www.alexrubber.com
To read the rest of this interview and visit Mistress Lubyanka then check out her website at www.lubyanka.co.uk
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